Err... ELLO

AlyssaJoJo here!

I know! We've been gone for so long. Blogging isn't anywhere near as easy as we thought it would be. Not that the actual making of the meal is hard... but then you have time find time to write, take pictures, etcetcetc. It didn't help that right around the same time my camera and my computer took a dump on me. They are both usable, if you can even use that word, but it's a pain to do anything with them. Luckily I've taken step one to bring my self back into the present electronic wise and finally got a new laptop. Nothing fancy, but way nicer than my 5+ year old once I was using. This is my laptop. There are many like it, but this one is mine.

But yeah, next step will be to get a new camera but until then I feel as if I'll just be using my cell phone one. (Baby steps people) This post will have no recipe due to the fact that I wanted to get something up as soon as possible and didn't plan well enough. 

Any how... I don't know what we will be doing exactly! Mama Lanette still has the database class from hell so it will mostly be me. I am not nearly as nice, or witty, of a writer as she is per say, but I'll try my hardest! 

Rice Noodles!

I love rice noodles. I’ll make a big batch on Sunday and eat them all week long. BBB most likely gets sick of them, but not Alyssa JoJo!

Ingredients

3.5 cups of chopped white cabbage

1 cup diced carrots

2.5 cups diced broccoli

1 small onion, chopped

4 garlic cloves, minced

3 cups of frozen peas

1.5 tbsp olive oil

1 box of thin rice noodles, 8oz

Sauce:
.5 cup chicken broth

.5 cup soy sauce

2 tsp rice vinegar

2 tsp cooking sherry

4 tsp sesame oil

2 tsp pepper flakes

2 tsp sugar

Mix together all ingredients for sauce. Set aside mixing here and there while working on the rest of the recipe.

Mix together cabbage, carrots, broccoli, onion, garlic, frozen peas, and olive oil. Fry up over medium low heat.

 As the veggies are cooking bring a large pot of water to a boil. Once water is boiling remove from heat and emerge rice noodles into water. Let them sit anywhere between 5 to 10 minutes, until they are at a consistency of your liking. 

 Finish cooking veggies and place aside. Place noodles into large bowl and with kitchen shears and cut noodles up until they disperse better. You should be able to easily take a fork through them.

Place the veggies in the bowl with the noodles and add in your sauce. Fold noodles and veggies until you find that the sauce covers the the full amount.

Eat on its own or serve with some grilled chicken. The leftovers are just as good as the night it was first made! Enjoy!

 13 one cup servings | 24g of Carbs | 142 Calories | 4g of Protein | 3g of Fiber | 3g of Fat

Egg-cellent Eggplant with Simple Summer Sauce

Egg-cellent Eggplant with Simple Summer Sauce (oh, how I crack myself up!)

Are you a lover of the eggplant?  Are you an “mmm….I kinda like it, but I don’t love it” person?  Do you tend to prefer it dipped in egg, then breadcrumbs, then fried to a glorious brown crustiness and then slathered in marinara and parmesan…HALT!  A delicious and still healthy alternative is about to be revealed!  

Eggplant is one of those veggies that Mama Lanette has been experimenting with in many variations over the years, determined to not just tolerate it, but to really enjoy it and look forward to preparing it and eating it (SOB be damned!).  Every time I stand in line at the grocery checkout lane and the person before me has an eggplant, I just can’t help myself.   I have to ask them, “How do you prepare that?”  Yes, I am one of THOSE people.   After the initial odd look, the resultant answers are varied, none of which have been satisfactory.    I think it is one of those things that unless you grow up eating it on a regular basis, it is a hard one to develop a true fondness for.   Well, hahaha, once Mama Lanette tells herself she is going to like something, she will find a way, oh yes she will.*

Not only is this eggplant the tastiest way I’ve ever cooked it;  creamy, smoky, rich, still somewhat firm in consistency, so it holds own against any sauce you throw upon it,  it is also the EASIEST AND SIMPLIST way I have ever prepared it.  Simply throw the whole thing on the grill and let it sit, only turning it occasionally.  Thank you BA Magazine…you are truly worthy of your subscription fees!    I have included my favorite height of tomato season simple tomato sauce to top it off.   It is literally a tomato bomb exploding in your mouth, or so I’ve been told (and I agree).   I hope you will not be disappointed.  This is truly one to please the eyes and the palate, I believe.   Please try, and as always, we welcome feedback!

Egg-cellent Eggplant

Ingredients: 

Eggplant.  If a main course, 1 medium eggplant per person. **

Instructions:

Throw a whole eggplant on a grill.  Do not pierce or poke holes, just set entire eggplant, intact, upon the grill at high heat.  Cook it up until it looks gross and all burnt up, approximately 30 minutes, turning carefully occasionally so all sides cook evenly.  Carefully remove from grill and place upon a plate.  Let rest  for a few minutes.  Remove skin, leaving the stem intact.  Let sit for about 20 minutes so juices separate.    That’s it.  Really, that’s it.

Simple Summer Sauce
Makes sauce for two medium eggplants, or for use over pasta, or in Mama Lanette’s world, one eggplant for ML and one serving of pasta for the SOB.

Ingredients:

Cherry Tomatoes, 2 pints.  If you are fortunate to grow your own or have access to a farmer’s market, please utilize!  It makes such a difference in the flavor.  For this blog, I used a combination of sungold and some purple cherry tomatoes.  The sauce was phenomenal in flavor.

Olive Oil, three turns around the pan.

Basil, fresh, from my garden*** (if you don’t have your own fresh, use according to your availability of fresh or dried, and preferred taste)  For this recipe I used approximately ½ cup fresh sliced basil.

Parsley, fresh from my garden (if you don’t have your own fresh, use according to your availability of fresh or dried, and preferred taste)  For this recipe, I used approximately ¼ cup fresh parsley.

Oregano, fresh from my garden (if you don’t have your own fresh, use according to your availability of fresh or dried, and preferred taste)  For this recipe, I used approximately four sprigs of fresh oregano.

Garlic, two cloves, minced or pressed (really, you haven’t gotten a garlic press yet? *judgmental stare*)

Salt to taste

Pepper to taste

Instructions:

After removing eggplant from grill, place cast iron skillet on grill.  Drizzle three turns of olive oil around pan and add tomatoes.  Close lid of grill.  Let tomatoes sizzle and start bursting, opening lid and tossing tomatoes occasionally so they cook evenly.  Once tomatoes are mostly burst, add garlic and 2/3 of basil, oregano, and parsley to top of pan.  Close lid and continue cooking for three more minutes.  Open lid and stir, lightly smashing tomatoes in process.  Don’t overly smash, you want a chunky, rustic sauce, and if you aren’t careful, you’ll squirt yourself in the eye with hot bursting cherry tomato juice…not pleasant. Remove pan from heat (use potholders!).  Add salt and pepper to taste.  Serve over eggplant or pasta.

To assemble eggplant in photo:

Carefully drain excess juices from eggplant.  I drain them into the tomato sauce, as it usually gets pretty thick and can be thinned out a bit anyway.  Using a knife, carefully cut a slit down the middle of each eggplant and spread outwards.  Spoon sauce onto eggplants.  Sprinkle with reserved herbs and some parmesan cheese.  Drizzle balsamic glaze or plain balsamic vinegar on top.  Serve.  Oh my goodness, this is truly delicious and so very good for you at the same time, and it is beautiful at the same time.  ENJOY!!!

Next week,freaks!  <3  Mama Lanette

*Disclaimer:  This has not yet happened with salmon, and yes, Mama Lanette has had it prepared every way known to man, canned, frozen, freshly caught that very morning, grilled, smoked, steamed, etc., please stop telling me I haven’t had it cooked the right way.  All you do is piss me off and make me want to bitch slap you.

** How do I pick a good eggplant?  A good eggplant should feel heavy for its size and be free of bruises and wrinkles. 

***If you don’t have access to fresh herbs and are going to use dried, use half the amount called for in fresh.  For example, ½ cup fresh basil = ¼ cup dried basil.  Also, for this recipe, leave out the dried oregano and just use dried basil and parsley. Oregano is quite strong once dried and needs a bit of time to incorporate.  This is a simple sauce and is quick and easy, just leave it out.  It will still be delicious!

Grilled Pork Chops with Creamy Poblano Sauce

Hey Y'all!!! Alyssa JoJo Here...

You know when you eat something and all you can do is talk about how good it is, over and over and over????  To the point where you discuss every amazing aspect about it and instantly start planning when you will make it again?  THIS is that meal! My friend, Lids, actually told me about the sauce we use in this recipe, I just changed some things around. But this will be made again... and again... and again.  Please try this dish, and as always, we love to hear your comments!

Ingredients:
4 Pork Chops 4-6oz, cut into smaller pieces about 1/2 inch ½ inch thick (doesn't matter if it's bone in or out - you'll be cutting the bone out when you make your pieces.)

2 teaspoon chili powder

2 teaspoon adobo seasoning

2 teaspoon salt

½ teaspoon pepper

2 tablespoon olive oil

Sauce Ingredients:

3 cloves of garlic

1 teaspoon olive oil

¼ teaspoon cumin

1 cup of chicken broth

1 ounce feta cheese

1 small onion, chopped

3 big poblano peppers (Bahaha, Sorry on embarrassing pictures BBB! This is what happens when you start the grill first thing in the morning!)

Earlier in the day when you have some spare time, mix together the chili powder, adobo seasoning, salt, pepper, and 2 tablespoons of olive oil.  Rub the mixture onto the pieces of pork. Cover and refrigerate for at least 1 hour. We did this while making breakfast and then took it out for dinner time. 

After you are done seasoning the pork, start working on the sauce. First things first, you HAVE to roast the peppers!  You want these things to be BURNT looking by the time you are done roasting them.  Char is your friend! 
Once the peppers are blackened and blistered, remove from heat source andimmediatlehy place in a bowl and cover with saran wrap (or place into a paper bag and close tightly). 

Mince the garlic and add to the chopped onion, cumin, and olive oil. Saute over medium-low heat until tender. Put off to the side and return to your peppers.

Your peppers should be cooled down now. Take off as much of the skin from the peppers as you can. Once that is done de-seed and de-rib the peppers and then dice up.

Add your sauteed veggie mixture, peppers, feta cheese, and chicken broth into a food processor or a blender and blend until a puree consistency. Place into the refrigerator with the pork. NOW, you do not have to premake this sauce. I honestly just find that when we allow ingredients like this sit together for a bit they take on this fuller flavor that you wont get when just making it and then eating it right off the bat. But I am aware of life... and there are plenty of times where I don’t have the chance to premake anything. 

When getting ready to eat grill your pork chops to they are a little charred out the border. As your pork is grilling simmer your poblano sauce on the stove. It will cook down a bit, but it should not be at a boil, or at a heat where it can burn. You are just basically warming the sauce through.  

When pork is done grilling, let it rest for 5 minutes.  Spoon the sauce over the pork. Enjoy. No, seriously, put this in your mouth and enjoy how amazing it is!!!!

4 servings | 254 Calories | 2g Carbs | 22g Protein | 1g Fiber | 12g Fat

Mexican Corn by Mama Lanette

Mexican Corn

(yes, Auntie PB, it is called Mexican corn,  and I swear  I am not being unsympathetic to the Mexican Americans or Hispanic Americans, or whatever you told me I am supposed to call the Hispanic descent persons when in Texas)

I started making this a few years ago after eating some Mexican corn from a food truck downtown Minneapolis.  Their version had mayo in it, and although that was delicious, I chose to leave that ingredient out of my home version to make a little lighter and fresher tasting.  This can absolutely be served on the cob, but I prefer to cut if off and serve it in a bowl.  It is much neater and is easier to prepare in advance (crock pot friendly, yo!).  Besides, Mama Lanette has nasty ass teeth, as do others in the family, and nobody likes to lose a tooth at the dinner table.  While it may be funny to the onlookers…it is not so funny to the loser of the tooth themselves.  Besides, it is truly displeasing to the tablescape, and the resultant blood spurt throws the whole party décor off balance.

This is an absolutely simple dish to make.  In fact, it never really occurred to me to post it on Feeding the Freaks, but at my yearly Fiesta, one of my guests specifically asked me if I would post it.  In response to that request, here ya go, David, enjoy!

Ingredients

Corn, 5-6 ears, husked and cleaned

Butter, ½ stick, or 4 tablespoons, cut into pats

Cilantro, fresh, ½ cup, chopped

Lime, juice of 1

Salt, 1-2 tsp, more if desired

Pepper, as desired

Cotija cheese, 1/3 cup (Cotija cheese is basically a Mexican parmesan and can easily be found in supermarkets that have a medium to large Mexican food selection.  It is usually right next to the queso fresco and queso blanco)

***See bottom note for winter preparation options

 

Prepare gas or charcoal grill.  Make sure corn cobs are husked and cleaned of all silk threads.  Place corn cobs on grill and let kernels char for a few minutes, but do not let them overcook to the point that kernels start to look dried out or sunken.  They should remain plump looking, or the corn will be chewy and tough...yuck!   You can always heat it up in the microwave or on the stove if it needs further cooking.  The key point is to get the blackened charring on it.

After the cobs are blackened, removed them from the grill and place onto a platter.  Let cool for a few minutes until able to be held by hand comfortably, or wear an Ove Glove, whatever yanks your chain.   On a cutting board, carefully cut kernels from the cobs using a knife. 

Place kernels into a bowl and drop butter pats on top.  Stir to combine.  (The corn may be too cool to melt the butter by this time, but that is okay, we can heat it up in the microwave or on the stove later)

Squeeze the lime over the corn.   Add cilantro, salt and pepper.  Stir to combine.  Taste.  Add more salt and pepper to taste.  Heat the mixture in a pan on stove or in microwave as needed.  Stir in Cotija cheese before serving. 

This is a very crock pot friendly dish.  I made this for my Fiesta this year, and it did just fine sitting all day on warm, tasting just as delicious at the end of the day as it did at the beginning. 

***Note 

Are you a person who lives in a climate that experiences a snowy, dark, and cold winter environment that  doesn’t provide access to grilling, much less fresh corn during the months of…well, let’s guestimate, shall we?...October through June?  Here are some friendly substitutions for this recipe, Mama Lanette tried and true!

Cooking Method:  Make it on the stove!  Sautee it in a pan rather than grilling it.  Use a little olive oil at first and then add the butter towards the end, as butter tends to burn easily at high heat, and then it gums up your pans, and is impossible to clean, and it is just not worth the fuss.  Oil, then butter!  Just don't use Pam!  I hate that shit!  (See diatribe on my hatred of Pam cooking spray on my Easter blog.)

Corn:     Trader Joes sells a remarkable fire roasted frozen corn.   Seriously, I have thawed this and served it cold in assorted side salads, and people have been none the wiser.

Target had a delicious Market Pantry brand yellow and white bicolor frozen sweet corn that is seriously cheap and delicious!  It is about a buck a bag and is better than anything that big old green guy will sell you. 

Cilantro: You can replace the cilantro with parsley if you have a cilantro-phobe in the family, as I do (that frigging SOB!)  Or you could just try to sneak that shit in and hope they are none the wiser, but occasionally the little weasels can sniff it out.

Cotija cheese:  If you have never heard of Cotija, it is basically a Mexican parmesan cheese.  If your local grocery store does not have any Mexican cheese such as queso fresco or queso blanco, then chances are they will not have Cotija.  In this case, I have nothing to suggest other than maybe trying parmesan, or just leaving it out.  I really don’t think it makes or breaks the dish.  And if anything, leaving it out will lighten the calorie load.  There are just some people who will eat anything if there is cheese involved…y’know? 

Iced Coffee the Cold Brew Way

Aaaaand we're back. I promise! I'm sorry we ever left you... but if you live in the Midwest then you know how much winter SUCKED ASS this year and how easy it was to get wrapped up into summer. However, today I, Alyssa JoJo, am coming to you with a refreshing drink that will help you beat the heat! Cold brewed iced coffee! It's easy, it's yummy, and it's cold without having to water it down with a whole tray of ice cubes.  Cold brewing also provides a cleaner flavor with less acid to upset the tummy.  It's a win-win situation!

Ingredients:
1 cup of ground coffee beans
Water
Mason Jar, quart sized
Milk of choice. Example; skim milk, almond milk, etc.
1 serving of sweetener. Example; Flavored creamer, Stevia, raw sugar, etc.

Take your Mason Jar and put in 1 cup of coffee grounds. I used a funnel with this since coffee grounds are thin enough to be able to get through. Pour water into jar up until about an inch away from the lip. Cover with Mason Jar lid and shake it like a Polaroid! Let sit for 12-24 hours at room temperature out of direct sunlight. (If for some reason it's sitting longer than that please refrigerate! We've all left that one used coffee filter in the coffee pot too long... we know what happens.

After coffee has sat for 12 hours, or however long you choose to brew, place a strainer atop a bowl. The bowl needs to be slightly smaller so that the strainer sits half way in it, not fully. 











Put coffee filter into strainer. Now, the finer mesh your strainer is, the better. I have a cheap Dollar Store strainer with big holes. This doesn't make it impossible, it just means I have a higher chance of coffee grounds getting into my strained coffee.

Pour coffee into the coffee filter and let drain. When bowl starts to be full enough where the coffee touches the bottom of the strainer pour out into a container that can go in the fridge. Don't feel bad if you have to switch to a new coffee filter. Sometimes my coffee grounds just clump together too much for me and I have to use a second one.  

Alternatively, place a funnel atop another mason jar and place a filter into that, slowly pouring contents into filter to strain (Mama Lanette's method)

And that's how you cold brew coffee. Seriously easy! Now for some amazing iced coffee. This is how I make mine! Pour eight ounces of cold brew coffee into a glass with 4 ounces of milk. Add in one packet of Stevia and mix well. Fill remaining part of glass with ice cubes. If I'm feeling cheeky I'll skip the Stevia and I'll do two tablespoons of flavored creamer for something more sweet. With the coffee, skim milk, and Stevia this iced coffee is ONLY 45 CALORIES! See what a difference making it your self does!

Chicken Satay, You Say?

Chicken Satay, You Say?  with Peanut Dipping Sauce and Pineapple Rice

 

I love chicken.  I also love peanut butter.  These two loves meet in a perfect union called chicken satay with peanut sauce.   Usually this is a dish I only have when visiting a Thai joint; however, that just doesn’t happen enough to suit me.  It requires getting the SOB to leave the house, and now that I’ve taught that man to cook, well, let’s just say I’ve kinda screwed myself in that regard.  Therefore, I took it upon myself to figure out how to make my own tasty chicken satay, and lucky you, am willing to share it with my fellow freaks.  I feel this recipe is exceptionally easy, as the marinade is also included in the dipping sauce.  However, there is no shame in using all of the marinade strictly for marinating the chicken and purchasing a premade peanut satay sauce.  Some people just aren’t into coconut flavor.  I didn’t feel the coconut was strong in this sauce, though.  In fact, the SOB despises coconut, and he did not even detect it in this sauce.   As always, tweak as you must.   

 

As a bonus, I have included my recipe for Pineapple Rice.  I absolutely LOVE fresh pineapple, and I buy at least one a week.  We go through them especially fast during the summer, as pineapple is very amenable to grilling.  Don’t be afraid of burning it, either.  Much like a marshmallow, the blacker it gets, the sweeter it becomes.  Grilling the pineapple before adding it to the rice gives it an extra special flavor, and if you are grilling the chicken anyway, why not throw the pineapple on the grill at the end of things?  It’s not like it takes extra effort or anything, you lazy ass!  Sigh…okay… if you have zero desire to buy a fresh pineapple, go ahead and get yourself some canned.  I haven’t tried it on the grill, but it may work.  Go for it.  If it works, it works.  If it doesn’t, then you know…  If it does, let us know.  We always welcome freak feedback! 

Chicken Skewers

1 pound boneless skinless chicken breast

Wooden skewers, soaked in water for 20+ minutes.  If you already own metal skewers for your grill, go ahead and use them.  No point in buying special skewers.  It’s  not like you’re going to eat them or anything.

Marinade/Dipping Sauce Seasoning

1/3 cup soy sauce

2 tablespoons fresh lime juice (approximately 2 limes)

3 cloves garlic, minced

1 teaspoon gingerroot, grated or minced

¾ teaspoon red pepper flakes

Dipping Sauce

¾ cup canned unsweetened coconut milk

2 tablespoons creamy peanut butter

¼ cup reserved marinade

Cut chicken into ½ inch wide strips.  Place into a plastic zip top bag. 

In a bowl, combine all marinade ingredients and stir well to combine.  Reserve ¼ cup of marinade mixture and set aside in a separate bowl. 

Pour marinade over the chicken in plastic bag and massage to coat the chicken with the marinade.  Place in refrigerator and let marinate for 30 minutes up to 2 hours, turning occasionally to redistribute the marinade onto the chicken. 

While the chicken is marinating, combine the coconut milk, peanut butter, and reserved marinade in a bowl and mix well with a whisk.  Add more peanut butter if you want a thicker consistency.  Seriously, how easy was that! 

After chicken is done marinating, thread the chicken strips onto the wooden skewers and grill according to your preferred method; gas grill, charcoal grill, grill pan on the stove, whatever you wish, until cooked through.   Note:  If you are serving the pineapple rice dish as a side, (see recipe below), this is when you would grill the pineapple, immediately when the chicken is done.  I usually cook the chicken until there are nice sear marks, and then throw on the top rack and finish it off (in case the insides are not all the way done). 

Serve the chicken skewers with the dipping sauce and enjoy.  If you have any leftover lime juice, drizzle if over the top of the chicken skewers for a little added flavor.  This is so freaking yummy!!   With or without the dipping sauce,  the SOB and I found this chicken absolutely delicious and it will most definitely be on our summer grilling rotation! 

What I learned:

The next time I make this, I am going to cut the chicken into kabob style cubes so they get more flavor from the marinade.  It was really delicious, and our only comment was that we wished the marinade had soaked into the chicken more.  Hence, next time, kabob it!

Pineapple Rice, Oh My Beloved Pineapple Rice*

Rice  (I prefer Basamati rice, it never seems to get sticky or clumpy, but it costs more than regular white rice, so don’t get your panties in a bunch over it)

Pineapple, fresh, 2 cups, diced.  For maximum flavor, grill the pineapple before dicing.  If you don’t have fresh pineapple, use canned.  I just always have fresh pineapple on hand because we eat a lot of it in our house, especially during grilling season.

Green Onion, 3-4, chopped

Ginger, 1 tablespoon minced or chopped

Garlic, 1 clove, minced or pressed

Sesame Oil, 3 tablespoons

Rice Vinegar, 1/3 cup

In rice cooker, add 2 servings worth of rice and water (according to cooker instructions).  Add ½ of sesame oil, ginger and garlic.  Turn cooker on and let it go until rice is cooked.  When finished, turn rice cooker off and add green onion, rice vinegar and rest of sesame oil.  Stir gently to combine.  Add pineapple and again stir gently to combine.  Serve immediately while rice is hot. 

*Note* This recipe involves using a rice cooker.  If you do not own a rice cooker, the instructions will need to be adapted for cooking in your preferred method (such as a pan on the stove).  If you do not own a rice cooker, and eat a somewhat decent amount of rice, I highly suggest purchasing one.  You can get one for well under $20, and they can be used for far more than making rice.  I use mine for steaming asparagus and green beans, along with other vegetables, and occasionally fish.