Chicken Satay, You Say?

Chicken Satay, You Say?  with Peanut Dipping Sauce and Pineapple Rice

 

I love chicken.  I also love peanut butter.  These two loves meet in a perfect union called chicken satay with peanut sauce.   Usually this is a dish I only have when visiting a Thai joint; however, that just doesn’t happen enough to suit me.  It requires getting the SOB to leave the house, and now that I’ve taught that man to cook, well, let’s just say I’ve kinda screwed myself in that regard.  Therefore, I took it upon myself to figure out how to make my own tasty chicken satay, and lucky you, am willing to share it with my fellow freaks.  I feel this recipe is exceptionally easy, as the marinade is also included in the dipping sauce.  However, there is no shame in using all of the marinade strictly for marinating the chicken and purchasing a premade peanut satay sauce.  Some people just aren’t into coconut flavor.  I didn’t feel the coconut was strong in this sauce, though.  In fact, the SOB despises coconut, and he did not even detect it in this sauce.   As always, tweak as you must.   

 

As a bonus, I have included my recipe for Pineapple Rice.  I absolutely LOVE fresh pineapple, and I buy at least one a week.  We go through them especially fast during the summer, as pineapple is very amenable to grilling.  Don’t be afraid of burning it, either.  Much like a marshmallow, the blacker it gets, the sweeter it becomes.  Grilling the pineapple before adding it to the rice gives it an extra special flavor, and if you are grilling the chicken anyway, why not throw the pineapple on the grill at the end of things?  It’s not like it takes extra effort or anything, you lazy ass!  Sigh…okay… if you have zero desire to buy a fresh pineapple, go ahead and get yourself some canned.  I haven’t tried it on the grill, but it may work.  Go for it.  If it works, it works.  If it doesn’t, then you know…  If it does, let us know.  We always welcome freak feedback! 

Chicken Skewers

1 pound boneless skinless chicken breast

Wooden skewers, soaked in water for 20+ minutes.  If you already own metal skewers for your grill, go ahead and use them.  No point in buying special skewers.  It’s  not like you’re going to eat them or anything.

Marinade/Dipping Sauce Seasoning

1/3 cup soy sauce

2 tablespoons fresh lime juice (approximately 2 limes)

3 cloves garlic, minced

1 teaspoon gingerroot, grated or minced

¾ teaspoon red pepper flakes

Dipping Sauce

¾ cup canned unsweetened coconut milk

2 tablespoons creamy peanut butter

¼ cup reserved marinade

Cut chicken into ½ inch wide strips.  Place into a plastic zip top bag. 

In a bowl, combine all marinade ingredients and stir well to combine.  Reserve ¼ cup of marinade mixture and set aside in a separate bowl. 

Pour marinade over the chicken in plastic bag and massage to coat the chicken with the marinade.  Place in refrigerator and let marinate for 30 minutes up to 2 hours, turning occasionally to redistribute the marinade onto the chicken. 

While the chicken is marinating, combine the coconut milk, peanut butter, and reserved marinade in a bowl and mix well with a whisk.  Add more peanut butter if you want a thicker consistency.  Seriously, how easy was that! 

After chicken is done marinating, thread the chicken strips onto the wooden skewers and grill according to your preferred method; gas grill, charcoal grill, grill pan on the stove, whatever you wish, until cooked through.   Note:  If you are serving the pineapple rice dish as a side, (see recipe below), this is when you would grill the pineapple, immediately when the chicken is done.  I usually cook the chicken until there are nice sear marks, and then throw on the top rack and finish it off (in case the insides are not all the way done). 

Serve the chicken skewers with the dipping sauce and enjoy.  If you have any leftover lime juice, drizzle if over the top of the chicken skewers for a little added flavor.  This is so freaking yummy!!   With or without the dipping sauce,  the SOB and I found this chicken absolutely delicious and it will most definitely be on our summer grilling rotation! 

What I learned:

The next time I make this, I am going to cut the chicken into kabob style cubes so they get more flavor from the marinade.  It was really delicious, and our only comment was that we wished the marinade had soaked into the chicken more.  Hence, next time, kabob it!

Pineapple Rice, Oh My Beloved Pineapple Rice*

Rice  (I prefer Basamati rice, it never seems to get sticky or clumpy, but it costs more than regular white rice, so don’t get your panties in a bunch over it)

Pineapple, fresh, 2 cups, diced.  For maximum flavor, grill the pineapple before dicing.  If you don’t have fresh pineapple, use canned.  I just always have fresh pineapple on hand because we eat a lot of it in our house, especially during grilling season.

Green Onion, 3-4, chopped

Ginger, 1 tablespoon minced or chopped

Garlic, 1 clove, minced or pressed

Sesame Oil, 3 tablespoons

Rice Vinegar, 1/3 cup

In rice cooker, add 2 servings worth of rice and water (according to cooker instructions).  Add ½ of sesame oil, ginger and garlic.  Turn cooker on and let it go until rice is cooked.  When finished, turn rice cooker off and add green onion, rice vinegar and rest of sesame oil.  Stir gently to combine.  Add pineapple and again stir gently to combine.  Serve immediately while rice is hot. 

*Note* This recipe involves using a rice cooker.  If you do not own a rice cooker, the instructions will need to be adapted for cooking in your preferred method (such as a pan on the stove).  If you do not own a rice cooker, and eat a somewhat decent amount of rice, I highly suggest purchasing one.  You can get one for well under $20, and they can be used for far more than making rice.  I use mine for steaming asparagus and green beans, along with other vegetables, and occasionally fish.  

Easy Peasy BBQ Chicken.

This recipe will have no pictures because it's just that easy. It also might be the shortest blog in history to ever be written. But when I found out that chicken was our theme for this week I just had to do my BBQ chicken, which I personally love and could gain 10 lbs just from over eating.

4 chicken breasts, or chicken of your choice
One bottle of BBQ sauce of choice, or home made
12 ounce can of Coca Cola
Seasonings of choice.

How I make this is I normally put all the chicken in a bowl and sprinkle some hickory seasonings on it and rub them in. You can also just do salt and pepper or whatever it is that you like on your chicken. Poor in a healthy amount of BBQ sauce and coca cola. Make sure that the chicken is covered with it and that you'll have enough left over to brush over chicken while cooking.

Now you can pan fry this, or grill it, bake it whatever. Just make sure that as you are cooking it you turn over and brush over extra liquid a few times.

And that's it! Seriously! Tasty BBQ chicken!

Mama Lanette's Guide to Doing Yo Mama Right on Mother's Day

Do you know what Mama Lanette likes to make for Mother’s Day?  Nothing!  I prefer to spend Mother’s Day having food prepared FOR me, and things done FOR me, and things brought TO me, and basically to not lift an itsy bitsy finger or move a teensy weensy toe for anything other than to get up to prepare myself a refreshing beverage.  Therefore, in honor of mothers everywhere, I am forgoing a recipe this week, and instead am providing a handy guide for you to provide to spawn, spouse, and significant other so that they can fully provide you with the maximum enjoyment, relaxation, and comfort that Mother’s Day is meant to be.   Abide by Mama Lanette’s seven step process, and your mama will soon learn to love, and not fear, the holiday known as Mother’s Day.

Mama Lanette’s Guide to Doing Yo Mama Right On Mother’s Day

Step 1:  Let Mama sleep in. Once morning starts waning and afternoon starts creeping in, go ahead and wake Mama up, but wake Mama up with her favorite coffee beverage.   STOP!  Don’t try to make it…that may sound cute, but in retrospect, cuteness is not a flavor.   Ask Daddy to drive down the road and purchase it from Starbucks/Caribou/Dunn Bros., whatever Mama’s favorite java joint is, and then bring it home and give it to her…no cutesy homemade things with subpar taste today…the key is that it should taste as good as it looks and is pleasing to Mama. 

Step 2:  Have Mama’s favorite sweatpants/yoga pants, along with equally comfortable upper body wear, laid out and ready for her to slide into upon emerging from her slumber.   Example:  Mama Lanette’s favorite home outfit consists of a tank top, hoodie, capri length yoga pants or boxer shorts, depending on the weather, and flip-flops.  Hygiene this day should consist of nothing more than a quick face washing and tooth brushing, with hair quickly being thrown up into a clip or hairband.  Have these items at the ready on the sink, along with a stick of deodorant.  I mean, really, we want low maintenance, but there is never a good excuse for B.O.  Continuing on,  Mama does not want to get dressed today.  It is hard work to look good.  She needs a day off.  Low maintenance is the key to a successful Mother’s Day.  Taking us to a brunch/dinner at some fancy pants place where we have to shower, apply makeup, straighten our hair, and squeeze into nylons and uncomfortable footwear is only going to piss us off.

Step 3:  Entertainment:  Does your mama like to watch movies?  Is she a reader?  Is she is gamer?  Is gardening her passion?  Whatever your mama likes to do in home entertainment, give her this day to partake of the hobby to her heart’s delight.   Have her favorite movies already rented from the nearest Redbox and stacked up next the DVD player.  Artfully arrange her magazines next to her comfy lounge area for the day and have her smartphone or iPod fully loaded with her Audible books of choice.  Make sure those game controllers are charged and ready to go…everything at the ready freaks, everything at the ready!   If you have to pay off one of her Ruzzle or Words with Friends pals to play unlimited and instantaneous games with her throughout the day, then do it!  It’s Mama! 

Step 4:  Gifts.   Homemade cards are precious and everlasting.  Kisses and hugs, likewise.  Mamas also like gifts that involve spas, clothing, jewelry, hair care, alcoholic beverages, evenings out with other adults, shooting range passes, etc.   Mama Lanette is fortunate enough to live in an area where there is an Aveda Institute (cheap!), so last year she took Grandma JoyJoy there, and they both got their hair did.  It was fun, and will be a repeat experience this year.   If there are daughters in the family, a mother-daughter pedicure is a lot of fun, but a pedicure is fun even if Mama goes has to go it alone (as is the case if there are only boys in the family because they usually do not want a pedicure, but some do, and if they do, well...what the heck, go for it!  I would suggest a rainbow colors, but there are 7 colors in the rainbow and 10 toes, and so you have to work that out on your own).  And really, visiting a nail spa isn’t even necessary.  Most ladies I know have an entire salon’s worth of supplies at home, and just volunteering to do their nails for them while they sit back and catch up on their magazines or book reading or Facebooking or Words with Friends is worth its weight in gold.  And seriously?  I don’t know any woman who will say no to a gift certificate to anything.  Just giving us free money to shop is exciting enough, even if it is the local Rainbow Foods.  Let’s have a talk about wine now...  Does mama have a particular wine that she likes?  Well then, ha ha ha...get her a case of that shit and let her store it for future use.  Or she can drink it over a few days’ time.  Mama Lanette is not one to judge your mama’s drinking habits.

Step 5:  Mother’s Day Food and Drinks.  This varies by individual, so take a deep dive into your mama’s head and think about her and what she likes to eat and drink.  Remember…it is MOTHER’S DAY.  It is about her, not you. Mama Lanette’s perfect Mother’s Day menu would be an unlimited supply of Barefoot Riesling on ice (cuz she is redneck in that way) and an assortment of tacos.  That’s all, simple.  Does your mama love coffee and pizza?  Then give her coffee and pizza!  BUT give her the best coffee and pizza she could ever ask for!   Is it Diet Coke and chocolate?  Get her a 12 pack of Diet Coke and stick it in a cooler full of ice so it is at its iciest, frostiest, and coldest it can get right before freezing point, and then go to the nearest chocolatier and buy the best chocolate you can afford.  Does she have a favorite restaurant?  Order food from that restaurant to go, and bring it home and let her snack off of it the entire day, OR bring it home for a big dinner with the family.  Just make sure she gets what she wants!

Step 6:  Minions.  Yep.  You read that correctly.  This is key to a successful Mother’s Day.  Clean the house you lazy freaks!  Your mama takes pretty good care of you year round, and I think you can all get off your lazy asses and give her ONE day where her house is clean, the dishes are washed, the toilet paper roll is filled, and dinner is prepared or ordered out (we don’t care which as long as we don’t have to get dressed and put makeup on), and the dog crap is picked up in the yard.  One day…c’mon…it’s yo MAMA….you can do it!   

Step 7:  Bedtime.  The sign of a truly successful Mother’s Day is watching Mama suddenly stand, lazily stretch and yawn, and head off to bed  a good hour or two ahead of norm without having to clean, cook, or prepare for the next day…just saying…maybe y’all could clean up after dinner, take your baths, and make your own lunches (for the next day) this one evening?  And if Daddy happens to suddenly stretch, yawn, and head upstairs after her, well…it’s Mother’s Day (he’s probably tired from all the work he did running for her all day to keep her happy)   ;-)

Cupcakes for muh mama!

It's that time of year again! Time to celebrate Mom, which means my weekly recipe is dedicated to Mama Lanette. I was pretty lost on where to go with it, asking advice of other moms I knew on what they thought a good recipe would be. But then I really started thinking about MY mom and what SHE likes... I mean, I know she likes food, but what is it that she LOVES?! And then it came to me, wine.  Mama Lanette sure does love her wine. Don't believe me? Come on over and check out the three empty bottles of Barefoot Riesling displayed on a shelf from when she helped us move. Three bottles, one night, just her. Yes, she's classy like that. I really hope you enjoy this recipe because it's a Riesling Cupcake! Jigga wut now?! Yes that's right, I put wine and cupcakes together. Where's my reward?

Cupcake Ingredients:
2/3 cup of butter, soft
1 1/2 cup of white sugar
2 3/4 cup of flour
3 teaspoons of baking powder
1 teaspoon of salt
3/4 cup of Riesling
3 eggs or 7 egg whites
1 teaspoon of vanilla

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Cream together butter and sugar. Make sure the butter is soft so that this doesn't become clumpy.

Add eggs or egg whites to mixture and blend well. Add Riesling and vanilla and again, mix well.

Next we will be adding flour. Now, if you don't have a flour sifter, go get one! I was one of those people who completely didn't think that one was needed. I got one around Christmas this last year and man oh man, it DOES make a difference. It just makes everything smoother, even if it does add on a little time to your process. DO IT! GO BUY ONE! ... But yeah, add flour. You can just add it all at once and mix it, or you can add it a cup at a time, mixing well between.Then add baking powder and salt and give it one last mix.

This should make between 20-26 cupcakes depending on how much batter you put in. I use an ice cream scoop for my cupcakes. I find that this is the perfect size and helps it where they are pretty even in size.

Bake between 15-20 minutes. Stick a fork or a tooth pick in one to see if it comes out clean. If it's clean, then it's finished baking. Let cool as you make the frosting.

Frosting Ingredients:
2 cups of shortening
8 cups of powdered sugar
1/2 teaspoon of salt
2 teaspoons of lemon extract or any extract of choice
6-8 ounces of heavy whipping cream

Using a mixer, beat two cups of shortening in a bowl. Do this until it becomes a creamy texture.

Cup by cup, add powdered sugar to shortening. This is not fun, nor is it clean. Don't be a jackhole like me and wear all black while doing this. With each cup it's going to become tougher to blend well but keep going. Once all 8 cups are added quickly mix in salt.


Measure out 6 ounces of heavy whipping cream. I always start out with six just in case that is enough. Blend at a very high speed with a mixer for a few minutes. If you feel like you need to, add in the extra 2 ounces of heavy whipping cream and blend again on a high speed.

Add in the flavor extract of choice and blend again. You're going to see here that mine is pink. I added in some food coloring cause once again, this recipe is for muh Mama and she loves her some pink. Frost the way you desire.

AND WALA! Here's a cupcake perfect for those wine lovers! Happy (early) Mother's Day to my lovely Mommi Dearest. ;)

Tomato Basil Turkey Meatloaf

I love this meatloaf.  And it has to be turkey.  If you make this with beef or pork, it just won’t taste the same, so there.  I actually love all meatloaf, but this is my favorite so far.  Although, I must admit, Alyssa JoJo’s meatloaf cupcakes are looking mighty fantastico, and I will be trying them in the very near future.  I mean, really?!?  Bacon wrapped, cheese stuffed, mashed potato topped, and BBQ sauce drizzled? 

Anyway, my tomato basil turkey meatloaf is relatively easy, healthy, and very tasty.  The ketchup/dressing combo is homage to the SOB who loves the traditional ketchup-topped meatloaf, but I wanted to spice the flavors up to match the Italian theme.  It is my favorite flavor combination by far (but you can throw tomato and basil in pretty much anything and I will chow it down).  I always make a big batch of it and freeze it (see below).  I hope you try this and enjoy it!  As always, comments are appreciated!

2 pounds ground turkey

2 cups breadcrumbs

2 eggs

Sundried tomato/basil pesto * see note

1 large or 2 small cloves garlic, minced

1 medium onion, chopped small

Ketchup

Sundried tomato vinaigrette or Italian style salad dressing of your choice

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

In a bowl, combine ground turkey, eggs, tomato/basil pesto, garlic, and onion.  Add 1-1/2 cups of bread crumbs.  Using your hands, mix thoroughly.  If mixture feels too wet, add the rest of the bread crumbs.  If it feels okay, leave the remainder of the bread crumbs out.  You don’t want to add too much in the breadcrumb department.  If the mixture is too dry feeling before baking, it will be far too dry after baking, and that, my freaks, is why so many generations before us will swear upon somebody’s grave that they despise meatloaf; a horrid 25% meat:75% cornflake/saltine cracker/breadcrumb ratio (to be economical).  I say, start out by adding 1-1/2 cups, and if it feels gross icky sticky, add the other ½ cup, but no more than that.  If you think you need to add the other ½ cup, here is what you do…you yell, “Hey, *insert name here*,  get your ass out here in the kitchen and pour this ½ cup of breadcrumbs into my bowl!”  Then they do that, and you can continue mixing away.  It is really gross touching stuff with meaty hands, so just don’t do it.  Ask for some help.

Okay, now listen carefully to this next part…there is no shame in wearing rubber gloves when mixing any sort of ground beef mixture, or working with raw meat in general.  Mama Lanette does it all the time.  In fact, I always buy myself a cheap box of rubber gloves when I visit the local Menard’s or Home Depot and keep them handy for times when I have to make burger patties, meatloaf or meatballs, separate family packs of chicken breasts for freezing, etc.  *gag*.  They also come in very handy when you are dealing with hot peppers.  In the words of Taylor Swift, “never ever ever” cut jalapenos, or any hot peppers of like, and then touch your face, eyes, lips, open sores, etc.   Doing so will result in hours of excruciating pain and a delay in dinner that will really tick off the family.  The simple wearing of rubber gloves can prevent many a dinner time fiasco.  Anyhoo, rubber gloves are a friend in the kitchen, yo.  They also help in the sanitary department if you are a lover of the fake nail…but I digress.

Add mixture into a bread pan and smooth down the top.  Place into preheated oven and bake for 1 hour at 350 degrees.  Remove meatloaf  from  the oven and drizzle top with ketchup and dressing.  Blend the  two sauces together lightly with a knife or back of spoon.  Bake for another ½ hour until somewhat caramelized looking.  Remove from oven and let sit 10-15 minutes.

 Here is my favorite part!  Having only two people in my household, one of whom does not care to eat leftovers, and the other of whom has an eating disorder, I LOVE making things that I can wrap up and freeze for a future meal.  Meatloaf is a remarkable candidate for this.  Once the meatloaf has set, I slice it into six thick pieces.  Two are served for dinner immediately with a nice veggie side.  The other four are separated into two foil packages.  These are then marked with a Sharpie, cooled, and stored in the freezer for future dinners.  See how that works?!?!?  One evening of cooking = THREE meals!  That means there are two free evenings when Mama Lanette can come home and spend some time with her sexy Mr. Riesling rather than slaving away in the kitchen making dinner.  I love to cook, but some nights, everybody needs a night off. 

*note – I make my own tomato basil pesto.  There, I’ve said it, and I feel good about it, gosh darnit!  I have posted in the past how easy it is to dry your own tomatoes, and I do this every year and swear by it.  I freeze them in Ziploc bags, and I also make dried tomato/basil pesto and freeze it in ice cube trays to use throughout the year in an assortment of things from dips to meatloaf.  I am well aware, however, that this may not be a common household item, so I am going to give a few options for substitutions:

Buy some sundried tomato/basil tapenade and use 2-3 tablespoons.  Taste first to determine saltiness, as olives may be used in the mixture.

Use tomato paste and basil.  I would say about 3 tablespoons tomato paste and 1 tablespoon dried basil (2 tablespoons if fresh)

 

Buy some sundried tomatoes and fresh basil.  Place in a food processer and drizzle with olive oil.  Pulse until a chunky paste.  Add approximately two ice cube sized dollops.  Freeze remainder and use at a later time.

Enjoy your meatloaf,  little freaks!  <3  Mama Lanette